I slept in this morning. I think my body knows that weekends without long training rides and runs are coming to an end. I slept and then, for about half an hour, hung out in that place between sleep and waking where dreams happen. Even when I woke, I spent the better part of the day in my flannels. First, I wrote. Then I read a book I’m editing for a client. On both counts, I was productive in the best way, doing work that doesn’t feel like work.
This afternoon I did a workout and spent some time on the phone with a friend. Then I cleaned up and was amazed to find that I still had an entire evening ahead of me. Thankful for that time, I did what I often do. I picked up a book.
Tonight, I picked up The Wisdom of the Enneagram, a book a career coach friend recommended to me. It’s a personality profile system. I find the type descriptions to be sometimes disturbingly accurate about me and others. The last person I dated and I did the self-assessments and read through the descriptions and agreed that they are on point and helpful. I go to the book sometimes when I need help figuring out what to do in a particular situation. It helps me assess what I want and where I think the other person involved is coming from. It’s not a solution, but it’s a tool, often a handy one.
Within the Enneagram system, I’m categorized as Type 9, The Peacemaker. The Peacemaker’s basic fear is loss and separation. The basic desire is inner stability and peace of mind. Yes and yes. The book talks about how Peacemakers ignore the disturbing aspects of life and seek peace and comfort by numbing out. “They respond to pain and suffering by attempting to live in a state of premature peacefulness, whether it is in a state of false spiritual attainment or in more gross denial.” The book’s advice? “They must remember that the only way out is through.” This reminder is helpful to me.
Here’s to a lovely day at home and the determination to feel my way through the hard stuff.