A Weighty Matter.

I got a stern talking to last night. Dave and I were talking via Facetime, and I told him that I didn’t like what I saw in the mirror at the gym during my trainer session last night. I’d done so well last year losing a bunch a weight, and these last few months, it’s been creeping back on. My pear shape is returning. Of course, since Dave’s a boy, I didn’t put it quite that way, but I did express my disapproval with my body, and he went off on me – in the most loving way – about loving myself and accepting myself as I am.  Continue reading

A “New” Home.

I almost don’t recognize my house. It’s perhaps more organized than it’s ever been. The clutter on my kitchen counter? Gone. The piles of projects on my dining room table? They are finished or stored somewhere out of sight. All the bills and other paperwork piled up in my office? They are shredded or filed away. The three stacks of magazines that have been building up on my living room floor have miraculously disappeared. Even my closet and drawers are organized. I’ve taken one big carload to Goodwill, and I have one more that needs to go. This whole place feels…better. Continue reading

A Steely Resolve.

With my big race behind me for the year, I’ve been refocusing myself on training for the Portland marathon and getting ready for Dave to be in town. Overall, I’ve slowed down quite a bit. I’m resting more, have less on my calendar, and have even seen some movies this week – Begin Again and Obvious Child. Tonight I’ll see Tammy. It’s been lovely. I’m trying to use this period before Dave gets here as a reset of sorts – resetting my schedule, my goals and my mind. Continue reading

Pendant Drama.

When I got out of bed this morning, I heard a little “clink” on my hardwood floor. I looked down and saw that my Ironman pendant had fallen on the ground. My pendant was a gift from my mother – something she put around my neck when I crossed my first Ironman finish line in 2008. Once I got over the shock and horror that my sweet mother had purchased anything Ironman before the race – something I never do for fear that I’ll jinx something – I loved it. In fact, I have worn that pendant nearly every day for the last six years. But somehow over night, the clasp on the chain opened and, when I stood up, the pendant fell. Because my mind immediately goes to the negative, I thought, “Does this mean I’m not going to finish this race? Have I fallen away from being an Ironman?” Continue reading

My Dinner With Coach.

The night before I flew out of town for Memorial Day weekend, I met one of my high school tennis coaches, his family, and another player and her mom for dinner. I played for this coach my sophomore year of high school. I played the number one spot for girls’ singles and doubles, but I did so under the shadow of the previous year’s number one player, who was a far better player than I and had a much better ranking in the state than I did. In short, the year hurt, partly because I had to change schools because my family moved and partly because I thought the coach didn’t like me. I found out at dinner the other night that he didn’t dislike me. In fact, he gifted me with one of the best compliments I’ve ever received. Continue reading

Looking Up.

Yesterday was a rough day at the office. Then last night, Dave pointed out that I haven’t had a bad day at work in over a month. He’s right. Work has been good. Fun even. And it’s been going smoothly for quite some time. I just lost my grip yesterday and let my mind go into a spiral mind f*ck like I’m sometimes prone to do. It’s just like Dave to steer me to the positive.  Continue reading